i wish i never applied for college
cws: general hopelessness, talking about finances
the title's it. i wish i never did.
i wish things weren't so. intensive.
i don't know why i thought it would be a good idea. i can't handle the financial deficit, the workload, the responsibility, i can't do it.
i didn't want to register again, but i was told to. i'm going to get dropped from my classes again, i'm not even gonna be able to make it. i'll never get financial aid because they cut me off and my parents don't want to pay the 3k.
i should've known. it's my fault for putting everything off for so long, for waiting until the last possible second. of course. it's my fault, it's all my fault.
i'm such a pathetic person. that's not me pity-farming, it's true. i wish i never did any of this. i wish i was just a normal person who wouldn't've messed up so badly to the point of having my financial aid taken away from me. i wish i was just a normal person who admitted that that happened and didn't i keep it hidden. i wish i was just a normal person who didn't lie about everything because i'm such a people pleaser. i wish i was just a normal person.